Thursday, 28 July 2011
Been having weird nightmares everyday and it is freaking me out. Honestly, even before school start, I am already so stressed!!! Haha or maybe God is trying to convey some messages through my dreams. Lols I must be thinking too much! I am actually quite selfish. Once I found a goal, I forgot everything else. This is not making sense. I always thought that goal was a good thing and teachers are always teaching us to have a goal in mind and not to stray away from it. But why, why do I feel that I am missing out a lot of important things in my life? These nightmares that I am having are constantly reminding me of what I have been missing out in. It's making me feel so uncomfortable, weird and sad. As if someone has just stabbed me a few times. I think I am in need of a counsellor now so that I can pour out what I am thinking to him/her. I don't really know what I am thinking now, my mind is in a state of mess. Sometimes, dying seems like a better option to me but yet again dying even before I accomplish anything sound a little stupid. Going on a little journey with myself this Saturday to clear my mind a little. Or maybe I should ask someone to go with me? Hmm sound like a bad idea, whenever I scroll my phone list, so many names yet nobody seem free so I end up not having the courage to ask anyone out since I believed they are all quite busy. Anyway on a happier note, I cook for my Mum and aunt to eat today. Is just a simple meal of Japanese curry but still I felt happy about it. Strange of me. haha guess I should just end it here. Shall blog when I have the time but coming August I see myself getting minimum free time with all the school load which is definitely coming in a few weeks' times.
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Monday, 25 July 2011
Sometimes I wonder if you could read my mind. Just when I wanted to blog, I realised you just did!! In fact just 20 minutes before me. Been thinking about many things and realised yet again that I am very timid!! It is starting to get on my nerve. Can't I just do what I always wanted so that I won't regret it next time just like what I did every time I look back in time and saw what I have always wanted to do yet always never done a single thing about it. It pissed me off so many times yet whenever I heard from others about the possible failure, I halt and turn the other direction. The safer choice according to many people. I really envious those who stay true to their words and managed to reach their designation. I hope and wish to become like them but I am filled with doubt. So much of it such that I am going to suffocate in them. I lose the energy to even fight back to the overwhelming voices that is continuing to come my way just like a tsunami that is going to flood me. The only thing I could do now is to show them using my actions that I can do it. Even if I ended up being the dead fish that are washed up the shore by the tsunami, I guess I will still be proud to say that at least I tried to swim against the current and fight for my dream. Hmm I am not sure how long I can live though so must as well try to do what I want to do instead of just dreaming of it and wait until I am like 30 or 40 years old then think back of how I just go with the flow. I spend 20 years to finally sort things out. Why? Why can some of you decide so quickly in life even if sometimes you know so well that you might not even success? Perhaps it has to do with everyone's perception of success. Everyone define it differently so stop pushing all your definition of success to me. Let me figure out my own definition of success in my life.
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Thursday, 14 July 2011
JSS freshmen orientation camp was great!!! Have fun in changi chalet for 3 days and it was a little pity that i have to go back yesterday night instead of today morning. anyway just to fill you guys up, will tell you a little of what we did. First day was visiting the central library and completing some quest like finding books from the shelves. We had our afternoon tea in the library, such a rare experiences since it isn't often that we had a chance to eat and drink in library. Haha after that was games in the LT. Is to see how much we understand about Japan. There is like 5 sections if I not wrong and each sections have 6 level. The 5 sections are anime, location, songs, brand and food. Basically, I know very little about them. Felt a sudden need to build my knowledge a little bit more so that I won't make a fool out of myself. The only thing I know best of Japan is my Ai Chan and Yuu Chan. Plus a few other seiyuu that I have mentioned in my previous post. Haha ok that is beside the point. So after that was dinner time before we set out on a long journey to Changi. First time camp in a chalet so it was quite a different feel then the usual camp that I went for previously in secondary and JC. So when there is night, there will be night walk. Lols forget about my lameness. Let's continue, the seniors tried to pair us up for the night walk but apparently it fails. Haha okok they were just having their fair share of play for the night walk. Anyway we were made to hold a lantern as our only source of light throughout the walk. Thankfully it lasted until the last station and Wei Jie and I only left like a few minutes of walk and so it wasn't so bad. I forgot what we did after that but I remember sleeping at 2am in the morning. The next day was our Japan marathon day around 'Singapore'. Ok actually cannot really consider Singapore because we only went to 3 places and it was mainly around Orchard. I don't know what got into us but we suddenly become very enthusiastic after being the last team to reach Kinokuniya which is the first location that we are supposed to go to. We became the first leading group after the Japan marathon. I can't really remember what we did in the night again. Guess I am getting old already. Anyway third day was beach game and bbq. After that, all groups have to perform a skit to show the seniors, there were other graduated seniors that came back and yup they are also very friendly towards us. I drank sake and volka and sort of get addicted. In the end got a little drunk and was like swaying like mad. Haha lucky I am only half drunk, if not my mum would have killed me when I reach home. Now is like super late so I couldn't update quite long as there is work tomorrow morning.
I just realise I haven't uploaded any Hikasa Yoko photo. She is the seiyuu for Akiyama Mio. Not really super good looking but has a really strong voice. haha shall uploaded a few before I sleep.
I like this picture. They just fit together^^
She look really cool here.
I don't know what she is cosplaying.
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Sunday, 10 July 2011
Wow my Ai-Chan is getting so hardworking. I hope these few days she don't blog so often because I am going to miss it if she is going to blog everyday since I am going for a 4 day camp starting from tomorrow. Haha hmm steps check now. I am now 19080 small steps away and 23 big steps away from my goal. So proud to be 100 steps lesser away from my goal. Going for interview this coming saturday. Really really hope I did well for it so that it will be faster to reach my goal. Praying hard now~ okok now is a little late. going to sleep now. Nights~
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Saturday, 9 July 2011
Oh my god!! My ai chan sure is hardworking!!! She blog again yesterday. Even I am not as hardworking as her!! First time she blog 3 days in a week plus she blog in consecutive days. Lols I think I am going crazy already. I think I sound like a desperate kid who hasn't eaten sweets for a very long time and is craving for sweets... haha ok enough of my nonsense back to my own life.Hmm been stopping anime for awhile and I went back to my manga craze. Started reading K-On manga last Wednesday and already I have finish reading the manga and is like waiting for the new chapter to come every Saturday. Haiz, miserable life just for waiting for 10 plus pages in one week. Same as my Negima manga. Sobsob:'( But thankfully this week there is two chapters of Negima^^ But But But there is no Setsuna in these two chapters!!! Not even once she appear!!!:( Disappointed:( However Konoka did appear a couple of pages. haha should feel a little satisfied.
Haha and yup recently I am dead broke!!! But when I think of how many lesser steps I am towards my goal, all these are very worthwhile^^
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Thursday, 7 July 2011
wow suddenly my ai chan so hardworking and blog today when she just did so yesterday. So rare, must be something really excited that she cannot wait for another day to post it. Haha until now I still don't understand much about what she write in her blog. Hope the day when I can finally understand what she wrote come sooner.
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Tuesday, 5 July 2011
Taking a break from anime after watching so many episode of K-On. Monday Japanese lesson was fun^^ Come to think of it, Japanese lesson has never been boring. Haha actually wanted to blog this yesterday but don't know how what to continue writing so in the end never post which is a good thing I supposed since my Ai Chan actually add a new post today. Yup so many things going to happen soon. In just one month time, I am going to the university as a student. Honestly, I don't feel really very excited about that because is just another transfer of school just like what happen when we graduate from primary school and moved on to secondary school and also the same apply to graduating from secondary school to junior college. Just glad that I have friends in NUS and I am going to make new friends soon. Just calculated my steps. I am now 19180 steps away from my goal. Haha slowly but surely I am moving towards it and I am proud of it^^ well is rest time now so good night everybody. おやすみなさい。
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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Saturday, 2 July 2011
Finally managed to get more students. I am happy yet scare of my current situation. Happy because with more students mean more pay and of course few more steps nearer my goal. However, can I really teach that high level? I am pretty afraid that I couldn't answer their question. Currently there are 5 students under me and I am thinking if I should look for more or just stop and see how it goes. School haven't started yet and already I can feel the stress building up. But is ok after the hectic life of JC, I think I should be able to cope well, at least I hope? haha I am currently 19250 small steps away from my goal and I want to do it within 24 big steps. Dear God please give me whatever strength that I need to continue. THANKS!!!^^
Meanwhile let me try and see if I could upload the pictures that I have promised to put up.
This is the 8 main character that I was talking about in one of my previous post. Yup K-On is an anime that I like the group as a whole a lot. Of course I am a little bias and like some of the group member more then the others but still it is better if they are in a group as their characteristics just make the band a more perfect one. That what a band should be but not many band can achieve that I supposed. Well my two favourite character for this anime is Akiyama Mio and Azusa Nekano. Hmm but for Mio, I actually like the voice actress Yoko Hikasa more than Mio. Haha I think I am still in my Seiyuu craze. Anyway, I believe there will be a season 3 for K-On since the manga is still ongoing about their college life and I look forward to it. Meanwhile, I am still waiting for my Negima wallet to be delivered. Hmm wonder how long it might take. Well off for lessons now. Shall update when I have the time~
只、君の笑顔が欲しくて、僕はここにいるんだ。
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